2014

Its 2014! Im not usually one for new year resolutions and all that stereotypical stuff. But with all kind of new stuff going on, I thought- why not? I should be blogging more and keeping everyone up-to-date but I have been… well lazy. And fat.

So here are my resolutions for this new year.. my goals and wants for the new year of new motherhood, wifehood, and studenthood.

Losing 50+ pounds of this baby weight. Hey I lost it with Spaz, why not now? I waited almost 9 months to start losing the baby weight with my first, but this time I plan on getting back on the treadmill horse and kicking it into gear as soon as I get the thumbs up from Michelle, my doctor. This pregnancy has been a huge one for me. I have already passed the weight I was when I GAVE BIRTH to Spaz. It didn't help when the nutritionalist from the health department called me heavy and told me that my weight gain was concerning. In my defense I am still healthy as a horse. I have low blood pressure still from when I was a running before this pregnancy, and all my testing for diabetes and proteins have come back normal every visit. I just like my cupcakes. So for this weight loss adventure- I will keep you updated on how I will do it. I follow the blog Eat Yourself Skinny and LOVE this girl! Not only is she gorgeous, but she has amazing style that I obsess over and she has been using this system called Tone It Up with some more gorgeous babes. Since I will have two littles in the house and no mother living with me, Ill have less time to get to the gym as much as I did with Spaz. So I want to find something for at home that will really kick my ass- well more burn it off and throw it out the door. Hopefully I can get my sista from another mista (you know who you are) to come over and do this with me.

Becoming a more patient and calm mother. This one hits close to home for me. Parenting is really hard sometimes. And with the stress of school and and soon single parenthood for another year, my patience level can start to drop. I don't want that. My kids didn't ask to born to a military house, or to a mother in school full time, or to a dramatic mother for that matter. And every time I walk into Spaz's overpriced daycare, I see the sign that says.

Only you can decide what makes you angry.

Aint that the truth? It makes me think about how I react to things at home everyday. Especially with this pregnancy pressuring down on me. I have been feeling this impending doom or labor and pain coming my way and Im impatiently waiting to get it over with. Because of this and the upcoming departure of my Beast, I find myself getting more irritated with Spaz at the end of the day. Then feeling guilty more and more. This year I vow to practice calming techniques. Practice smiling more. Practice reminding myself that he's only 2 years old. Practice squeezing him (in an appropriate pressure level) more and kissing his cheeks everyday. And practice telling myself that I am a good mother. Even with the 35 eggs in my basket and all.

Become a better wife. This year I will become a better wife and military wife to my Beast. Pregnancy isn't fun for me. Im not one of the glowing, love my body, embrace the pain kind of women. Im just not. And I won't let anyone make me feel bad for that- especially those who haven't been pregnant because you have NO idea. But I will admit that I shouldn't be as hard on my husband as I can be with these hormones and my low self-esteem during these times in my life. I may be his fault I am getting fat everyday, but he also is giving me something that some cannot give when its what they want most. Even though Beast is going to be away from us for a year, I can practice and become a better wife for him to come home to. I will become more tolerant and more patient with him during these times of stress from work. I will enjoy more moments with him and encourage him to continue to be an amazing soldier. I will tell him more often he is a wonderful father. I will kiss him everyday and tell I'm I love him and thank him for being so good to me because there are too many out there that don't have this. And when he asks for a dog…. I will say no. Because he won't like the wife I will become after that.

Last but certainly not least, I will get into Nursing school. Period. Theres not questions about that. It will happen.

So heres to my birthday in a few days- and heres to you ALL praying I go into a healthy and quick labor SOON. None of this- you can wait a few more weeks so its on my birthday, crap. You are just being cruel. And you don't want to poke the bear at this point. For real- I'm bigger than a bear. Grr...